Freedom didn't teach
us how to love. We’re
figuring it out together.
Small gatherings in Amsterdam, in a hand-picked circle of curious thinkers, where questions on love, relationships and belonging get better answers.
What an evening looks like
- 01
Something to start us off
A film, an article or a real-life dilemma — while relaxing with some drinks and nibbles
- 02
Guided discussion
A facilitated exchange with a host, with structure and direction
- 03
Practice and reflection
Thought experiments in small groups, and quiet time to make it your own
- 04
Leaving with fresh ideas
Something you can use from the next day onwards
How it works
From philosophy to economics, from history to psychology. Big ideas paired with real-world experiments. Not just theory. No more seemingly-deep chats at the dinner table that disappear by morning. Here, the conversation turns into something you can act on.
Who it’s for
Curious thinkers who feel the usual answers about dating, commitment, relationships and belonging do not go far enough.
Who you’ll meet
This is not an open event, a dating app or a social club. It is a curated circle of people selected for their open minds and seriousness. The extraordinary quality of the company is a key part of what we’re offering.
Testimonials
“Honestly, I came for the reading list. But the best part happened after: taking ideas from the conversations and actually trying them in my own relationship that week.”
“I’ve been in plenty of rooms where people care about self-development. But this felt different. People cared about becoming better at loving, but also about each other and the world.”
“What stayed with me was how easily the room moved from the macro to the micro. From how society is changing, to how I listen, avoid conflict or make room for someone else.”
“It was nice to be part of a group of people trying to overcome their burdens and worries and questions through the lens of love. It felt positive, not wallowing.”
“It was the first time I met people who were thinking about love with the same seriousness I usually associate with work, politics or art. It was liberating.”
“The conversations were intellectually serious but never abstract for the sake of it. We would start with something concrete like a real-life story and ask what it might mean for our actual lives.”
Request an invitation
Groups are deliberately small, so places go quickly.
Leave your email and we'll be in touch about the next meeting in Amsterdam.
Getting started
Begin with an in-person chat
We meet to introduce ourselves and the project, understand who you are and what you are looking for and explore together whether this is the right fit. You are choosing us as much as we are choosing you.
Join an evening discussion
Your first time is on us, no commitment required — even though we think you’ll love it! After that, around €20 per session.
Go further, if you want to
For those who are looking for more, we also run masterclasses, retreats and groups that meet every few weeks across the year.
Who we are
We are Jen and Emmanuel. For over twenty years, we have been exploring the same question from different angles: how do you build deep, lasting, meaningful relationships?
Emmanuel worked as a lawyer before turning to the ideas behind The Intimate Intelligence Project, rooted in a long-standing interest in how societies evolve. Jen has spent her career helping companies improve their relationship with society and now splits her time between that and the project.
Together, we have designed and hosted gatherings in London and Amsterdam where people talk seriously about sex and love, family and our changing society. We've aimed to fill the gaps we kept seeing around us: conversations about relationships that rarely led to real understanding, and people having nowhere to actually practise. What began as an informal club among friends has evolved into The Intimate Intelligence Project.
We are not therapists, coaches or gurus. What we bring is sustained research, a holistic perspective on how relationships are changing and years of creating places for sincere, intelligent and generous dialogue.
OUR POINT OF VIEW
We've built a world organised around freedom.
And freedom matters. But the relationships that matter most ask something more of us: vulnerability, commitment and the willingness to adjust to others.
Nobody teaches you how to do that. So we learn from fragments: podcasts, books, therapy, dating, heartbreak. Piecing together answers on our own.
Our perspective is different.
Amo, ergo sum
I love, therefore I am
Love isn't a feeling. It's a choice and a practice. A way of relating to ourselves, to others and to the world. Because how we relate in the intimate sphere shapes how we connect in the public sphere as well.
We can develop the knowledge, skills and confidence to live in this way. But we cannot do it alone. That's what we're building: a circle of people exploring how to love and looking to practise it together.
Join a carefully chosen circle to explore what makes freedom meaningful.
For people who have built lives with freedom in them, and are ready to ask what love offers next.